PhD Chronicles: Part VII

I like reading books written by authors who aren’t linked to science and academia to get a different perspective on life. What intrigues me the most is how most biographies of successful people out there are about the self-made man. If you don’t understand what this means, the self-made man is the archetype of successful men and women who had to start from the bottom, in poverty and hardship, to reach the acme of their chosen careers against all odds.

If you are a music connoisseur and American HipHop fan, you must have heard a lot of songs about the self-made man. Some include, Drake – Started from the bottom, Rick Ross – Self Made 1/2 albums, 50 Cent/The Game – How we do etc. So, it is easy to see that the American dream and the self-made man are intrinsically linked. This is because the self-made man originated in the United States. It was first described by Senator Henry Clay in 1842 who used the term to describe individuals who attained success on their own with little or no external help.

Drake – Started from the bottom

The self-made story is seductive because it offers many the hope and encouragement that anyone can become one, with hard work, consistency and persistence. However, in reality, the self-made man is a myth. I had previously written about it here. Hard work, consistency and persistence are all prerequisites for success but we all need people to move from point A to point B at different stages of our lives. And there’s no shame in admitting that nor asking for help.

In the context of a PhD degree, no one goes through the journey without external help. Although the PhD is a lonely journey in which you are “always” on your own, the effect of support from family, friends and colleagues is really underplayed. I’d use myself as an example here. My current supervisor played a major role in me securing the funding/grant for the PhD and till now, she has continued to support me in so many ways. My colleagues and technical staff have also come to my aid in the laboratory when I was stuck. Also, I had to collaborate with researchers from other universities and the industry to get to this point. Lastly, journals are often written by more than one author. So can I really say that I am self-made? Is anyone really self-made?

It’s our ego that makes us downplay or ignore the external efforts we get en route to our success. Our ego gets in the way at times and we can’t help it because power and influence are two things humans naturally yearn for. So, we momentarily embrace self-aggrandisement and instant gratification. However, it is important to plough the long-term path and acknowledge the effort others contributed to your success no matter how little or minute you may think it is. This way you empower others thereby building a stronger network that may propel you to even greater heights. After all, every master was once an apprentice. And every PhD Student is just an apprentice in research. Never outshine your master.

PhD Chronicles: Part VIII

Hello there! It’s me again. I know it’s been long since my last post and a lot has happened within that period.

The world was thrown into turmoil with the COVID-19 pandemic, the UK left the EU, Boris Johnson commissioned three national lockdowns, remote working became a “norm”, the killing of George Floyd by the Police during his arrest in the US caused an unrest that spread across the world, Feminist Coalition raised £290K through crowdfunding and spearheaded a fearless campaign against police brutality in Nigeria and beyond with the #ENDSARS hashtag trending all over the world, Pharmaceutical giants rolled out COVID-19 vaccines and Trump refused to concede defeat to Joe Biden in the US Presidential Elections.

Phew! It’s been an eventful period, which has seen a lot of people suffer both emotionally and mentally. I can’t imagine what it has been like for students, especially those who have had to study from home or online. It must be tough not being able to meet up with their peers after class for a drink, a cup of coffee or just a chat. How lonely that must be/feel.

I might sound a bit biased here but I am sincerely worried about PhD and other graduate students, especially International students who are on a timeline to produce relevant data, publish papers/journals, write up their theses and complete their studies during this troubling time. Their productivity must have dwindled. I do hope they are all getting the help/support they need from teaching/research staff, friends, family and colleagues in order to deal with the stress. They need it more than ever before!

As I am sat here in my kitchen listening to my music playlists, I want you to know that it is okay not to be okay. A strong person is the one who admits s/he is not okay but has refused to stay down. Take some time out for yourself. Go for a walk, talk to your family/friends, watch stand-up comedy or TV shows you enjoy, listen to podcasts or do things you enjoy doing without feeling guilty.

Always remember that asking for help allows you to welcome people who can make you feel good into your life. This can help you deal with this challenging situation thus improving your relationships, resilience, mental health and mindset. A growth mindset will facilitate your self development.

However, there seems to be light at the end of the tunnel now and hopefully things will go back to normal, whatever normalcy entails now. Stay safe! 😊

PhD Chronicles: Part VI

During the course of this programme, I was introduced to podcasts by a friend and ever since then I’ve been hooked. Listening to podcasts made the long hours in the lab bearable especially when I’m all alone doing microscopy. I swung like a pendulum from one podcast to another, including The breakfast club, Alex Jones show, Joe Budden podcast, the church of what’s happening now, uncovered with Dr Laura Berman until I settled for the The Joe Rogan experience.

There’s something about this particular podcast that piqued my interest: it can be honest, funny, deep, informative/educative, real and raw all at the same time. The guests come from all walks of life ranging from comedians, politicians, musicians, sportsmen to scientists. However, what really impressed me about Joe Rogan was his abundance mentality and how he encourages people who have something to say to start their own podcasts. He understands that there’s enough room for everyone to excel and their successes won’t deter his own.

The abundance mentality stems from a deep sense of self and inner sense of self-worth. It is an archetypal thinking that there’s more than enough out there for everyone. It reflects in kindness, generosity, sharing accolades, complimenting and being happy for others. In return, it creates rooms for options, possibilities and alternatives. Contrastingly, the scarcity mentality is the mindset that you have to hoard whatever – whether it is time, knowledge, skills, money, food, emotions – you have as there will never be enough. This stems from fear, insecurity and a place of lack, and often reflects in envy, desperation, jealousy, talking trash about others, plotting/lying against others and malice.

The concept of abundance and scarcity, with regards to the mind, was explained by Stephen Covey in his book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. He described those with scarcity mentality as people who see life as having only so much, as though there were only one pie out there. And if someone gets a big slice of the pie, it would mean less for everybody else.

Most people, including those in science, academia and corporate world in general, are ingrained with scarcity mentality. Companies often pit staff against each other and in the advent of promotions, raises or recognition, people tend to put others down or hoard information that they perceive will give their competitors an edge over them. This is short term thinking and often useless in the long term.

Most people feel overwhelmed like an impostor when they start their PhD journey. It is important that they are given enough support and assigned someone who would take things slow and calmly explain things to them in the most simplified way. This is reassuring and let’s them know that everyone makes mistakes.

Mistakes compound your fear so the last thing they need is for supposed superiors to look down on them, talk to them condescendingly or assume that they have nothing important to offer. And this is where the abundance mentality comes in. An abundant thinker will be generous with his or her time and knowledge to help the newbie. Always remember that you were once a newbie like them so slow things down.

The newbie doesn’t need to hear you brag about your experiences or accolades. Switch the focus from yourself to them. Listening to your endless bragging will inadvertently make him or her more tense and scared about the journey ahead.

And to the newbie PhD student, I want you to know that this is just a phase and nothing is permanent. If you put in the effort, you’d grow in knowledge and become confident. Don’t be envious or jealous of others, those you think are ahead of you were once in your shoes so keep your head down and get to work.

PhD Chronicles: Part V

One of my best authors is Robert Greene. His debut book, The 48 Laws of Power, published in 1998, was described as ‘the psychopaths Bible’. Although these laws seem somewhat evil and narcissistic tools to manipulate others, however, if you actually take a critical look at these laws you would notice that some of them are things we do, consciously and unconsciously, on a daily basis.

Here are some of the laws in the Book:

Law 3: Conceal your intentions

Law 4: Always say less than necessary

Law 5: So much depends on your reputation; guard it with your life

Law 9: Win through actions; never through arguments

Law 10: Avoid the unhappy or unlucky

Law 12: Use selective honesty or generosity to disarm your ‘victim’

Law 16: Use absence to increase strength and honour

Law 17: Cultivate an air of unpredictability

Law 34: Be royal in your own fashion

Law 36: Disdain anything you can’t have; ignoring them is the best revenge

Law 40: Despise the free lunch

Take a look at the aforementioned laws. Have you ever practised or still practise any of the laws on the list? If I am to guess, I would say that the most likely answer is YES. This is because power is a natural phenomenon. Every human yearns for power and influence knowingly and unknowingly. Whether one accepts it or not is an entirely different story altogether.

Many believe that power corrupts but I beg to differ. I sincerely believe that power is liberating and allows you to freely express your authentic self that you may have been hiding for any reason. Unfortunately, power does not always result in positive circumstance. For so many people, their authentic self is tainted with an insatiable thirst to control, manipulate, abuse or get back at others.

Sirach 30:10-11 Has anyone ever known that he could get away with cheating someone, and not taken advantage of it. If so, he deserves his wealth, and everyone will praise him for his generosity.

This is why there’s a general misconception that power holders are inconsiderate dimwits who do not care about others but that isn’t true. And I say it all depends on the individual that yields the power.

I have previously written about my struggles with the impostor syndrome during the early stages of this journey. At the time, I felt powerless and as a consequence, most of the people I resorted to for help looked down on me. And I sincerely understand. Power and powerlessness affect our perception of others.

Power is a great mechanism in changing of behaviour. Power comes along with confidence, assertiveness, courage, quick decision making and increased hormonal levels (high testosterone level and low cortisol (stress hormone) level). However, being powerless makes you second-guess yourself, seek external validation from others and instils fear that stops you from going after what you really want and need.

The fact that power can bring about a change in one’s behaviour is the reason why I encourage everyone to seek power via knowledge for knowledge is power. You don’t have to be a bookworm but you MUST love knowledge in order to acquire it. And the simplest way to do this is by mere observation of things and people around you, and experimentation as Alex Ferguson said in his book, Leading, “there’s a reason God gave us two ears, two eyes and one mouth.”

Ecclesiastes 9:16 Wisdom is better than strength. But the poor man’s wisdom is despised, and his words are no longer heeded.

Ignorance and curiosity drive scientific research but the at the end of the day, we acquire knowledge that can transform the world. However, how this knowledge is framed to the public is important. If it is presented in a negative, aggressive or condescending manner, knowledge loses its power. As a result, scientists have to allow the public to mirror scientific information against their personal beliefs by showing them how science belongs to them and how they belong to science. That way knowledge becomes powerful and can be worth its weight in gold.

PhD Chronicles: Part IV

Growing up, I had this mindset that I didn’t have to toot my own horn for anyone to appreciate and understand my worth. It is either you see it or you don’t – your loss anyway. I was conditioned to believe that it is bragging and no one likes a braggart hence I talked less and did more.

However as I grow older, I have come to understand that I need to unlearn that. Self-aggrandisement is really key and crucial to your future achievements. You may be very special but you have to sell yourself to be recognised.

Sales is something we do everyday – be it a product, person, service or even an idea. We are always trying to sell ourselves to others to accept us. And this ability to sell and persuade others is linked to our innate understanding and definition of ourselves.

Selling yourself short is one of the reasons why your special attributes are not recognised by your potential employers and/or clients. Have you noticed that people who can talk or sell themselves very well whether they bullshit their way through a conversation or interview often land the best deals? He or she may be less talented or smarter than you but she understands something about social intelligence, which is selling yourself the right way.

This is where most intelligent people fall short. They often lack the courage and boldness that less intelligent people do. They often focus so much on themselves and forget that you have to be able to get the attention of your audience or prospective employers by selling yourself the right way.

You have to sell yourself the right way to open and get in the door first before anyone can be able to recognise and appreciate your worth. When you say ‘no’ to new opportunities or ideas that seem daunting, play down your own accomplishments, steer the conversation away from yourself or refuse to put yourself out there for whatever reason, you are inadvertently selling yourself short.

What this translates to whomever is listening to you is that you lack confidence, undervalue yourself and overvalue others, put up with things you shouldn’t and don’t demand respect. As a result, you’d end up in toxic relationships and have minimal experiences because experience is what separates the chaff from the wheat.

No one likes that person that goes on a monologue about their achievements. However, you’ve worked extremely hard to be where you are today so own your story and tell it with zest. Find a balance and design your life the way you really want it to be. Be self aware to identify your weaknesses but focus on challenging and mastering yourself so that you can project yourself to a whole new level.